Psalm 23:4 - Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
Warning – I don’t want this message to be a downer – so work with me!
Mourning is part of life, just as death is. I’m struck today by the tragic story of actress Natasha Richardson. She was learning to ski on the bunny slope with her family in Canada. She fell, got up and was laughing about it and called it a day. About an hour later, she complained of a headache and now she’s braindead. No warning. No signs. Just like that. There are many others I’m sure that you know personally that are nearing the end of physical life here. I can think of two right now: Scott’s grandmother and a young woman, Jennifer, with 2 children and brain cancer.
We also mourn things in life: dreams, experiences, expectations and more. While I was pregnant with Ryan I remember telling Scott how bittersweet the last month of pregnancy is. It’s filled with anticipation of meeting this child and sadness because you’ve had this blessing all to yourself (I knew when he moved, kicked, punched, had the hiccups). I also knew that this would probably be the last time I’d experience it (I’m no spring chicken, you know!). Scott wisely shared, “Isn’t that the way it is with Heaven? Kind of bittersweet.” We long to be there to be in the presence of God, our Father and others who have gone on before us. But yet we don’t really want to leave this life either because we have family and friends to care for and share things with and dreams to dream and new adventures to experience.
I remember being a young, single woman living alone in my apartment. Sometimes I would get fearful of what could happen. Maybe I’d be raped and murdered (you know your imagination runs rampant with stuff like this). Then I’d snap back into reality and tell myself, “What’s the worse that could happen? I’d go to Heaven.” Although I understand that thought, it now makes me sad. Heaven is God’s answer to death and mourning. Heaven is joy, new adventure – it’s God! I now long for Heaven. Not in a way that I’m going to do something tragic to myself so I can go now, but just yearning to be in God’s presence with no distractions, total peace continuously – WOW!
The funny thing about mourning is that it proves we’re alive. When we mourn a dream, experience, job or expectations or whatever it may be, we have to own all the emotions involved in that situation and hand them over to God and say, “here they are. I don’t know what to do with them. Please take them and show me what things look like now.” We must feel them. We must go through those feelings and sort them out. Then our sweet Father delivers a new adventure. It’s an adventure that can generate new life and joy if we let God do what he wants to do.
Some things I’m mourning and the new adventures that go with them:
Date night with the love of my life, Scott = It will return shortly. It’s only gone for a short season.
More time with my little man, Ian = Intentionally dedicating time and planning activities with Ian
More time with my little man, Ryan = intentionally dedicating time and planning activities with Ryan
Being a stay-at-home mom = I get to live vicariously through Scott who will be a stay-at-home dad for a while.
The luxury of being a 2-income household = tightening our belt and trusting God a whole lot more!
Maternity leave = Returning to work and learning a new balancing act
Sleeping through the night = it’s only for a season (hopefully shorter than longer!)
The verse says, “He makes me lie down in green pastures.” If He makes me do it, it sounds like I’m not so willing to do it sometimes. I think we only become obedient through mourning our loss and then letting ourselves receive the joy that comes with the new life he gives.
I guess you could say it’s kind of like coming to know Jesus or really any transformation. The process is hard, scary and sometimes demanding. But at the end of the day, He does make things new every morning and joy is part of it.
What are you mourning today?
How do you feel about it? What are you feeling?
How is God bringing joy through it? (and it’s ok if you don’t know yet, just be anticipating the joy because he promised it.)
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Resting through the fear
Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody. 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12
Well, we're adjusting to our "new normal" after baby Ryan arrived with a grand adventure on February 3, 2009! All is well here and I'm trying to get back in the groove of things in between naps, feedings and normal chaos.
Our sweet Father had a nice chat with me today. I use the term nice loosely... it was really one of his grace-filled, gentle scoldings. I love how you can be scolded yet encouraged at the same time. It's a God thing!
Anyway, as many of you know, our family has grown with the birth of Ryan about 5.5 weeks ago. My husband, Scott, was laid off in October and has yet to find any job that would be feasible to have 2 kids in day care. Since this journey began last fall, we've seen the hand of God deliver, provide, reassure and WOW us daily. We're keeping a long list of God moments from this season to show the boys and remind us of His power.
Speaking of that, it's funny how much like an Israelite I am. Scott and I were talking today about a situation that at this moment has no definitive solutions. Those types of situations (you know the ones that you can't develop a planned strategy to solve the problem) just make me anxious. So, I was operating in the flesh with this situation and then the enemy saw an opportunity to tack another one on. I started to fret about the pending medical bills, which we haven't even received yet. The Holy Spirit quickly brought Proverbs 3:5-6 and Philippians 4:6 to my mind. Immediately, our sweet Father questioned me, "Why don't you trust me with these things? Haven't I been faithful so far? Trust me!"
Today's verse choice is really all about trusting. It's fun to see how this blog is transorming from a focus on fear to trusting God. Hmmm... maybe that was the point! I remember really digging into this verse (1 Thess. 4:11) and not liking the idea that I had to lead a quiet life. I'm an enthusiastic talker and the thought of being quiet sounded boring to me. So I really struggled with this verse. Then I looked up the Greek word for quiet and it means peaceful or at rest. Praise Jesus! It made so much more sense. The more I trust Him, the more at peace I am which ultimately results people who don't know Him seeing Him through me. And I come to the understanding and freedom that I am dependent on no one but Jesus himself.
I'm reminded of the verses in Luke that describe the vine and branches. It's a great picture of surrender, rest and trust. I'm trying to live there more each day!
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Love & Prayers
Kim
Well, we're adjusting to our "new normal" after baby Ryan arrived with a grand adventure on February 3, 2009! All is well here and I'm trying to get back in the groove of things in between naps, feedings and normal chaos.
Our sweet Father had a nice chat with me today. I use the term nice loosely... it was really one of his grace-filled, gentle scoldings. I love how you can be scolded yet encouraged at the same time. It's a God thing!
Anyway, as many of you know, our family has grown with the birth of Ryan about 5.5 weeks ago. My husband, Scott, was laid off in October and has yet to find any job that would be feasible to have 2 kids in day care. Since this journey began last fall, we've seen the hand of God deliver, provide, reassure and WOW us daily. We're keeping a long list of God moments from this season to show the boys and remind us of His power.
Speaking of that, it's funny how much like an Israelite I am. Scott and I were talking today about a situation that at this moment has no definitive solutions. Those types of situations (you know the ones that you can't develop a planned strategy to solve the problem) just make me anxious. So, I was operating in the flesh with this situation and then the enemy saw an opportunity to tack another one on. I started to fret about the pending medical bills, which we haven't even received yet. The Holy Spirit quickly brought Proverbs 3:5-6 and Philippians 4:6 to my mind. Immediately, our sweet Father questioned me, "Why don't you trust me with these things? Haven't I been faithful so far? Trust me!"
Today's verse choice is really all about trusting. It's fun to see how this blog is transorming from a focus on fear to trusting God. Hmmm... maybe that was the point! I remember really digging into this verse (1 Thess. 4:11) and not liking the idea that I had to lead a quiet life. I'm an enthusiastic talker and the thought of being quiet sounded boring to me. So I really struggled with this verse. Then I looked up the Greek word for quiet and it means peaceful or at rest. Praise Jesus! It made so much more sense. The more I trust Him, the more at peace I am which ultimately results people who don't know Him seeing Him through me. And I come to the understanding and freedom that I am dependent on no one but Jesus himself.
I'm reminded of the verses in Luke that describe the vine and branches. It's a great picture of surrender, rest and trust. I'm trying to live there more each day!
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Love & Prayers
Kim
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Great message about fear
Can't believe I forgot to share this. Our Pastor delivered a great sermon on fear. You can download it for free from here: http://www.davidtarkington.com/
The message is called "Spectrum: Yellow". It's a must!
Kim
The message is called "Spectrum: Yellow". It's a must!
Kim
Delight through the Fear
Zephaniah 3: 17 - For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears.[a] He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.” (NLT)
This is one of my favorite verses and until I read this translation I never related it to my fears. I read this verse for the first time proabably about 5 years ago when I was deep in John and Stasi Eldredge's "Captivating" study. The thought that the God of the universe delights in me was and still is an amazing thought and reality. His love is what calms me.
It's so important for us to remember that God delights in us - just because. It's not about what we've done, or how we did it, what we said or didn't say. It's just because He's God and He chooses to.
I was continuing to read in Jeremiah and ran across this treasure: Jeremiah 9:23-24: This is what the LORD says: "Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, 24 but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight," declares the LORD.
Something our Pastor said has stuck with me. He explained that all too often people know what we're against, but not what we're for or what we support. I think God often gets categorized like that too. Throughout His word he tells us little nuggets of what He delights in, what pleases him. All too often we focus on the things he doesn't like instead of what he does. So take a few minutes and really think about how God delights in you. Then take another few minutes to think about what Jeremiah 9:24 says - He delights in being understood and known; that He exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth.
If He is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31) What did this do to your fears today? Rest in Him, in who He is. Long to know Him more. He always comes through.
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Love & Prayers,
Kim
Romans 15:13
This is one of my favorite verses and until I read this translation I never related it to my fears. I read this verse for the first time proabably about 5 years ago when I was deep in John and Stasi Eldredge's "Captivating" study. The thought that the God of the universe delights in me was and still is an amazing thought and reality. His love is what calms me.
It's so important for us to remember that God delights in us - just because. It's not about what we've done, or how we did it, what we said or didn't say. It's just because He's God and He chooses to.
I was continuing to read in Jeremiah and ran across this treasure: Jeremiah 9:23-24: This is what the LORD says: "Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, 24 but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight," declares the LORD.
Something our Pastor said has stuck with me. He explained that all too often people know what we're against, but not what we're for or what we support. I think God often gets categorized like that too. Throughout His word he tells us little nuggets of what He delights in, what pleases him. All too often we focus on the things he doesn't like instead of what he does. So take a few minutes and really think about how God delights in you. Then take another few minutes to think about what Jeremiah 9:24 says - He delights in being understood and known; that He exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth.
If He is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31) What did this do to your fears today? Rest in Him, in who He is. Long to know Him more. He always comes through.
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Love & Prayers,
Kim
Romans 15:13
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Obedience through the Fear
Jeremiah 1:8 - "Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you, " declares the Lord.
Jeremiah 1:17 - "Get yourself ready! Stand up and say to them whatever I command you. Do not be terrified by them or I will terrify you before them."
Happy 2009!
Finished reading through Isaiah (wow!) and have moved onto Jeremiah. Learning lots along the way. These two verses stood out to me. Again, our strong Father reminds us why we shouldn't be afraid - He is with us, He is for us, He wants the best for us. These verses have a simple message: obedience through the fear. God simply says, listen to me because I will tell you what to say. Say it and don't worry about it - just do it. What about the need for connection. If God gave me this kind of message I'd be so afraid I'd miss something I was supposed to say - the enemy using his normal tactics. The truth is that when we are connected it's easier to hear God's voice. When we're not connected, He still draws us near.
Lately, I haven't been very kind to my heart. Been doing, doing more and doing more still and not taking time out to care for my heart and what my relationship with the Lover of my soul needs. This week on two different occassions, God simply said, "Be still. Know that I am God. Enjoy me. Let me enjoy you. This is just for you." I was in a spirit of humble thanksgiving - just amazed at what He's been up to around me. Had a great conversation with a dear Christian friend of mine that was challenging to me spiritually. Then the next morning had great praise and worship time. Just singing his praises and enjoying his presence. Saw a rainbow in the clouds in the morning (and it wasn't raining). It was just full of surprises. I had to just be still - be obedient to what he asked of me - which in reality was do nothing - just be.
I look again at the prophets and what they endured. At the end of the day, it is all about obedience because He supplies everything else that is needed. I listened to Chip Ingram earlier this week (www.lote.org) and he said soemthing profound that I considered all week long: "God favors obedience over sacrifice." Where I've landed is here: There are often times that sacrifice is the by-product of obedience. However, with our "comfortable Christianity" we often consider our obedience to be a sacrifice instead of worship.
Obedience through the fear - enjoy the adventure. He shows us more of who He is along the way!
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Jeremiah 1:17 - "Get yourself ready! Stand up and say to them whatever I command you. Do not be terrified by them or I will terrify you before them."
Happy 2009!
Finished reading through Isaiah (wow!) and have moved onto Jeremiah. Learning lots along the way. These two verses stood out to me. Again, our strong Father reminds us why we shouldn't be afraid - He is with us, He is for us, He wants the best for us. These verses have a simple message: obedience through the fear. God simply says, listen to me because I will tell you what to say. Say it and don't worry about it - just do it. What about the need for connection. If God gave me this kind of message I'd be so afraid I'd miss something I was supposed to say - the enemy using his normal tactics. The truth is that when we are connected it's easier to hear God's voice. When we're not connected, He still draws us near.
Lately, I haven't been very kind to my heart. Been doing, doing more and doing more still and not taking time out to care for my heart and what my relationship with the Lover of my soul needs. This week on two different occassions, God simply said, "Be still. Know that I am God. Enjoy me. Let me enjoy you. This is just for you." I was in a spirit of humble thanksgiving - just amazed at what He's been up to around me. Had a great conversation with a dear Christian friend of mine that was challenging to me spiritually. Then the next morning had great praise and worship time. Just singing his praises and enjoying his presence. Saw a rainbow in the clouds in the morning (and it wasn't raining). It was just full of surprises. I had to just be still - be obedient to what he asked of me - which in reality was do nothing - just be.
I look again at the prophets and what they endured. At the end of the day, it is all about obedience because He supplies everything else that is needed. I listened to Chip Ingram earlier this week (www.lote.org) and he said soemthing profound that I considered all week long: "God favors obedience over sacrifice." Where I've landed is here: There are often times that sacrifice is the by-product of obedience. However, with our "comfortable Christianity" we often consider our obedience to be a sacrifice instead of worship.
Obedience through the fear - enjoy the adventure. He shows us more of who He is along the way!
Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Fear Not the Transforming Power of Christmas
Luke 1: 26 - 38 - 26In the sixth month, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, 27to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin's name was Mary. 28The angel went to her and said, "Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you."
29Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. 30But the angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. 31You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. 32He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, 33and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end."
34"How will this be," Mary asked the angel, "since I am a virgin?"
35The angel answered, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called[c] the Son of God. 36Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. 37For nothing is impossible with God."
38"I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered. "May it be to me as you have said." Then the angel left her.
I don't know about you, but lately (probably over the last 2 months) I've struggled with caring for my heart and really taking quality, meaningful, intimate time with the sweet Lover of my soul. It's not for a lack of "want to". It is that I let distractions and other things become more of a priority than spending time with him.
A friend of mine e-mailed me Christmas Letter blog from Mary Beth Chapman (Steven Curtis Chapman's wife). If you haven't read it yet it's a great read with challenging insight. (http://chapmanchannel.typepad.com/marybeth/2008/12/mary-beths-christmas-letter-.html) She talks about how they are adjusting to the "new normal" with the loss of their 5-year-old daughter Maria Sue. She goes on to mention Mary, the mother of Jesus as only a mom who's lived through a significant loss could do.
I love that whenever an angel appears to someone in the Bible that the angel simply states, "Do not be afraid." Usually when the angel is on the scene, transformation in a person's life is about to occur.
At work I, along with our entire senior leadership, have required reading over the next month: Deep Change by Robert Quinn. My attitude wasn't the best about this assignment. I don't have time to read the stuff I want to read, much less the stuff I now have to read. So, reluctantly, I dove in and was pleasantly surprised. Now keep in mind this is a business book, read with my spiritual eyes and heart (like I view a movie with my spiritual eyes and heart). So, there are some things in this book that have challenged me.
The book talks about the difference between "incremental change" and "deep change". Incremental change is defined as change that can be reversed; it usually includes a process that is built on experience from the past and if the change fails, then you can always go back to the way things were before with little harm. Deep change however is irreversable and risky.
"Each of us has the potential to change the world. Because the price of change is so high, we seldome take on the challenge. Our fears blind us to the possibilities of excellence - and yet another formidable insight. This insight concerns the price of not making deep change. That price is the choice of slow death, a meaningless and frustrating experience enmeshed in fear, anger and helplessness, while moving surely toward what is most feared. "(pg. 11 - Deep Change)
Deep change is about facing our fears and wanting transformation more than comfort. Then I think about Mary and Joseph more than 2000 years ago. Mary's response, "I'll do whatever you like," is full of more trust than fear. She didn't have a plan, or a step-by-step process. She just had to trust God with her life, her circumstances, her heart, her future and her son. She let transformation happen. She trusted the only one who can truly make deep change happen and walk with us through our fears.
So, I'm looking at this Christmas a little bit differently. Yes, it will always be the time we celebrate the birth of my Savior, Jesus Christ. But now I look forward to celebrating transformation and the power Jesus has to do that in me if I let him. Deep change is what I'm praying he delivers to me in 2009.
All the circumstances in my life have stripped me of the control I liked to believe I had. I have no idea how to be a mom of 2 boys; I have no idea what Scott's future job situation looks like; I have no idea how to adjust to the demands that face me at my job due to downsizing; I have no idea what to do with this blog or where it will lead. All are mysteries to me, but I know that God is in control and will provide me with the steps I need to take as I need to take them. I just have to be like Mary - live with more trust than fear.
Be bold - be brave - be you!
Merry Christmas! Happy Transformation!
Kim
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Through Fear
Romans 8:15 - For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the spirit of sonship and by him we cry, "Abba, Father."
First of all, sorry it's been a while since I've blogged. Life happens and I've unfortunately let too many things be distractions. But all is well.
I love this verse! It reminds me of so many things... what God has given us - a spirit of freedom (not to be a slave again to fear!) and a spirit of sonship. I'm realizing the more I dig into His word and what He says about fear that He constantly reminds us about who He is. Hmmm - that's the point!
I love it when our sweet Heavenly Father chooses to use children to show us more about his character and his plans. Here are some recent experiences that have wowed me lately.
I was picking Ian up from daycare one day. He had had one of those days. His teacher told me she had asked him to pick up the puzzles that he'd dumped out and put the car he was playing with away. I proceeded to urge him to do the same and he says to me with car in hand, "But, mommy, I don't know where the car goes." I told him to put it on the table next to his teacher so we could start picking up the puzzles. These weren't your normal puzzles - they were wooden and layered with several pictures on top of one another. I was having difficulty figuring them out, much less my nearly 4 year old son! Anyway, his excuse for not picking up the puzzles was that he didn't know how to put them together. We miraculously put the puzzles together and headed home for a great night.
On the way home, my sweet Heavenly Daddy whispered to me, "Not knowing what to do and doing nothing is not obedience. Do something." I reflected on my experience with Ian and saw the direct parallel. So often I let fear of making a mistake or making the wrong decision overpower me. Then I do nothing because I'm in the bondage of fear which ultimately results in disobedience. Now, I don't want to be foolish and just do anything because it's something, but I don't need to get stuck in a comfort zone of no action either.
Then, Sunday morning was Ian's first time singing in "big church". I missed it - was late getting to worship from my 9am ministry service. After all my tears of missing one of Ian's firsts, I got to hear all about it through my wonderful husband's eyes. Thank you, honey! As Scott shares the details of the experience, his eyes light up with pride and excitement. I asked Scott, "Did Ian see you?" Scott said yes and went on to tell me that Ian told his teacher near him while pointing at Scott, "There's my daddy!" Because we both serve the same Holy Spirit, He gently gave both of us this word, "That's how I feel when you give me the credit for working in, through and for you." Oh how God loves it when we say, "That's my daddy!"
So here is the challenge for us now:
Are you choosing (knowingly or unknowingly) to live in a spirit of fear, which results in no action (maybe even just a comfortable life), which equates to disobedience?
Ask God what living in the spirit of sonship looks like for you today? I think you'll be surprised how extravagantly he loves you and cherishes you. If you're not ask him to show you specifically and then be looking for ways (even in little things) he shows you.
How have you given God praise lately for who he is and what he's doing through and for you?
I'm so glad that God frequently reminds me of his sovereignty and power so I can remember who is in control - and thank you, Jesus, it's not me!
Sisters, be bold - be brave - be you!
Love & Prayers,
Kim
First of all, sorry it's been a while since I've blogged. Life happens and I've unfortunately let too many things be distractions. But all is well.
I love this verse! It reminds me of so many things... what God has given us - a spirit of freedom (not to be a slave again to fear!) and a spirit of sonship. I'm realizing the more I dig into His word and what He says about fear that He constantly reminds us about who He is. Hmmm - that's the point!
I love it when our sweet Heavenly Father chooses to use children to show us more about his character and his plans. Here are some recent experiences that have wowed me lately.
I was picking Ian up from daycare one day. He had had one of those days. His teacher told me she had asked him to pick up the puzzles that he'd dumped out and put the car he was playing with away. I proceeded to urge him to do the same and he says to me with car in hand, "But, mommy, I don't know where the car goes." I told him to put it on the table next to his teacher so we could start picking up the puzzles. These weren't your normal puzzles - they were wooden and layered with several pictures on top of one another. I was having difficulty figuring them out, much less my nearly 4 year old son! Anyway, his excuse for not picking up the puzzles was that he didn't know how to put them together. We miraculously put the puzzles together and headed home for a great night.
On the way home, my sweet Heavenly Daddy whispered to me, "Not knowing what to do and doing nothing is not obedience. Do something." I reflected on my experience with Ian and saw the direct parallel. So often I let fear of making a mistake or making the wrong decision overpower me. Then I do nothing because I'm in the bondage of fear which ultimately results in disobedience. Now, I don't want to be foolish and just do anything because it's something, but I don't need to get stuck in a comfort zone of no action either.
Then, Sunday morning was Ian's first time singing in "big church". I missed it - was late getting to worship from my 9am ministry service. After all my tears of missing one of Ian's firsts, I got to hear all about it through my wonderful husband's eyes. Thank you, honey! As Scott shares the details of the experience, his eyes light up with pride and excitement. I asked Scott, "Did Ian see you?" Scott said yes and went on to tell me that Ian told his teacher near him while pointing at Scott, "There's my daddy!" Because we both serve the same Holy Spirit, He gently gave both of us this word, "That's how I feel when you give me the credit for working in, through and for you." Oh how God loves it when we say, "That's my daddy!"
So here is the challenge for us now:
Are you choosing (knowingly or unknowingly) to live in a spirit of fear, which results in no action (maybe even just a comfortable life), which equates to disobedience?
Ask God what living in the spirit of sonship looks like for you today? I think you'll be surprised how extravagantly he loves you and cherishes you. If you're not ask him to show you specifically and then be looking for ways (even in little things) he shows you.
How have you given God praise lately for who he is and what he's doing through and for you?
I'm so glad that God frequently reminds me of his sovereignty and power so I can remember who is in control - and thank you, Jesus, it's not me!
Sisters, be bold - be brave - be you!
Love & Prayers,
Kim
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