Thursday, December 3, 2009

Calling

Saw this quote today defining "calling".  The gentleman who penned it is a believer and oversees Noble Heart Ministry.  Here's the quote:  "Your calling is to let people experience the weightiness of your life, to experience what is abundant in you, to experience your strength or beauty, in the place that God assigns you." --Gary Barkalow

I must tell you that I just started to cry.  All these questions welled up along with the tears.  Am I fulfilling my calling?  Am I doing the right thing?  What's my next step?  What does it all look like?  You know, the big questions that always come up and usually bring the enemy of doubt along for the ride. 

Gary's web site - http://www.piercing-the-veil.com/ - reminded me of ther verse:  2 Corinthians 3:18:  18And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect[a] the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

This so reminds me of my calling, my passion, what I was made for.  I'm made to do women't ministry through speaking and writing.  It's about trusting Him and remembering that I didn't make this calling up.  It is real and it's how I feel alive (right after having fun with my guys!).  So, as I am waiting, I am also praying and looking for ways that God will show me "what IT looks like!"

Here's the question.  What is your calling?  What makes you come alive?  What makes you get excited? Let your heart experience the calling, come alive and thrive!

Friday, November 20, 2009

You Are Hold Me

Psalm 139: 9-10 - If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 

I've been trying to expose my boys to a variety of worship music lately.  My 5-year old (well, almost 5) was singing away to "God of Wonders".  This particular song is pretty special to me.  When Scott and I got married this song was played when I walked down the aisle to see him and pray before we got pictures done prior to the wedding.  I was just glad my son was enjoying it.  There is a part of the song that states, "The universe declares your majesty; You are holy, holy".    Later that day, he just started singing it. This allowed me the priviledge of hearing his words to the song.  He is passionately singing the following: 
"The universe declares your majesty, You are hold me, hold me"  

My first reaction was one of "Oh how cute!", then quickly turned to a teachable moment.  I explained that the word was holy and that it meant very special, set apart, there is no one like God.  My son was quick to say, "No, mommy!  It's You are hold me!"   Then wouldn't you know the Holy Spirit says, "He's right, ya know!"  So take a listen to "God of Wonders" and while not forgetting the extreme holiness of God, listen to it with You are hold me.  It gives the song new perspective!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CBNE25rtnE

It's crazy how often we forget who God is even after he has shown us to many times to count.  Just last week I went into a minor panic about something that God has always taken care of for us.  But in that instant, I thought it was up to me instead of just letting Him hold me.  So what are you facing today that has you doubting, fearful, asking "what if..."?  What has you asking why or wondering where God is in all this craziness?  It's all about remembering:  remembering that He is truth, He is bigger than anything we face, He is who He says he is, He keeps his promises, He wants us to receive and bask in his love and freedom.  So what if you've never experienced him in that way before?  Well, simply read His Word and invite the God of the Universe to show you who He is.  Remember, You are hold me.

Be bold! Be brave! Be you!
Love & Prayers,
Kim

Friday, October 16, 2009

Who is the author?

Hebrews 12:2 - Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Romans 8:18 - I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.


So I'm just getting started with my day and while showering God plants this question in my head - Who is writing your story?    I don't know about you, but I get a little uncomfortable when God does that because I have to answer the question.  There is no place to hide - He's God! 

So as I'm thinking about my answer, I realize that  am writing my story more often than God is.  Then I dug a little deeper and had to confess the sin of unbelief/not trusting God to be who he says he is. 

Whenever we're in a difficult situation or circumstance, we make a bad decision or there is spiritual warfare going on from all fronts, we must hold onto Hebrews 12:2 and Romans 8:18.  Jesus is the author of our faith, our journey, our story.   The great thing is he's also the perfector.  There's this new song out, "Perfect People" by Natalie Grant http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=16481140 .  Here are my favorite lyrics: 
There's no such thing as perfect people

There's no such thing as a perfect life
So come as you are, broken and scared
Lift up your heart and be amazed
And be changed by a perfect God

Love that!  He is a perfect God and worthy to be trusted.  Then the hard part comes:  if God is perfect and he allows this "stuff" to be part of my life, what do I do with it?  The answer is simple, but not easily accomplished:  you go through it; you persevere.  That's where Romans 8:18 comes in.  It's all for His glory.  This is how we become reflections of Him, His beauty, His love, His hope. 

Be bold, my sisters.  Live out what he has allowed to enter your life to grow you, build you up and mold you into the amazing princess he has made you to be. 

So, who is writing your story?  Please join me in the journey of surrendering to let Jesus be the author and perfector of the story.

Love & Prayers,
Kim

Friday, September 11, 2009

Loving Fearlessly - Part 2

1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 (NIV) - Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life to mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you so that your daily life will win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody. (The Message has a good paraphrase for this verse - take a look at www.Biblegateway.com)

OK - confession time. The fist time I read this verse I literally told God, "You've got to be kidding me!" Then I dug in a little deeper and am now trying to live it out for real! I guess the part that I had the hardest time with was the word "quiet". Anyone who knows me knows that quiet is not an adjective that fits! So I had to dig and discovered this is what it means: at rest or at peace. Well doesn't that change everything!!

Now as I look at this verse about a year later, I'm struggling with a couple of other things. First of all the daily part. Living at peace every day is huge. I'm not there yet, but the idea sounds fantastic!!

The other part is the "not be dependent on anybody" part. Hmmm - guess that means that Jesus is supposed to be everything!!! I'm so glad he's up to the task. I thought of this verse the other day. I'm still slowly reviewing my notes from the Beth Moore simulcast. She was talking about the heart of our desires and the desires of our heart (Psalm 37:4) One of the things she said was, "Be aware of what is present in the absence." Wouldn't you know my 4-and-a-half year old would give me a great picture of this (God is so good at meeting us right where we're at!).

So, we're eating dinner. Ian doesn't want to eat the spaghetti I made. This was a first. He wanted to eat cheese and crackers. Unfortunately I was in one of my "I'm an exhausted mommy" mode and didn't do battle with this and let him eat cheese and crackers for dinner (cheese is a good source of calcium and protein right?). God immediately brought back to my mind Beth's statement and this verse.

How often we fill our hearts with anything just to have it full. Sometimes it's whatever feels good at that moment; sometimes what looks good; sometimes whatever is convenient or easy or we may even hate it but take it in anyway. How many times have I called my friends about something instead of going to God first. Basically, it's hiding from the fact that we have a desire that isn't met. I'm trying to get an idea of what the world would be like if all of us just admitted that we have unmet desires instead of pretending that we have it all together.

So, here is the question to myself and to you. What are you filling your heart with? Are you quiet and at rest because you're not depending on anyone or anything else but Jesus? If not, what are you going to do to get there?

Please join me in answering these hard questions and letting God strip away (and yes, it will proably hurt some along the way) the stuff that doesn't help you love Him fearlessly. 1Thessalonians 4:11-12 is what we look like when we love fearlessly!

Be bold! Be brave! Be you!

Kim

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Loving Fearlessly

1 John 4:18 - There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Sorry to say I've let life (and some bad choices on time management!) get in the way of blogging regularly. Can't believe it's been almost 2 months since my last blog - time flies! OK - on to the good stuff!

This verse has intrigued me for about 6 weeks now. I didn't understand the punishment part of it. When I dug into the Greek, the flood gates opened!

The Greek word for punishment (torment in the KJV) is "not enjoying love". Does that not blow your mind? "Perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with not enjoying love." I know I'm guilty of blaming other people for not loving me the way I think they should. But God has put this one back on me. How often do I get caught up in my own expectations, my own desires, my own circumstances and stuff that I completely miss how much God loves me and delights in me - even over the little things that I don't think will matter. He sees everything and is the only one who knows how the little things we think, say and do will impact others.

Don't hear what I'm not saying - I'm not saying "don't have expectations or desires and reactions and responses to life's circumstances and stuff". Experiencing those things lets us know that we're really living. Just don't let that stuff get in the way of you enjoying God's amazing, extravagant love for you.

So here's my question - Are you enjoying God's love for you? I mean really enjoying (to take pleasure or satisfaction in) God's love. If not, then take some time to rest there until you are enjoying His love. If you are, great job, but how are you going to abide there. This is definitely a choice that you alone can make.

Picture this: What does loving God fearlessly look like? (this is where you pull out your journal and write about the pictures and stuff that God gives you!)
For me, it's a picture of trust. God holding out his BIG hand and me resting in the middle of it. Trusting that He will be who he said he would be and do what he said he would do. Now, each situation in my life - the "resting" part is probably the hardest. Sometimes I have to wrestle with God in order to get to the resting place. Sometimes I go compliantly. Other times I don't rest and I miss out on taking in and enjoying His love because I'm so busy focusing on other stuff.

Next question - How do you love others? Do you love others fearlessly?
How about your spouse? How about your kids? How about the person at work that gets on your last nerve? What about the people that don't look or think like you?

Now, I'm not saying be stupid and give your heart to everyone! Ask God what this looks like (another journal opportunity!). If you're in an abusive relationship, then yes, you need to get out and not love your abuser fearlessly - leave that up to God - He's bigger! Loving others fearlessly to me means not expecting anything back - just giving and letting others enjoy the fact that they are loved by God becuase ultimately it's Christ's love through me that makes me even capable of loving others, much less loving others fearlessly with no thought of getting anything in return. This one to me is even harder than the first question. The good thing is that love is a fruit of the spirit - can only be done with and through Jesus!

Be brave! Be bold! Be you!

Love & Prayers,
Kim
Romans 15:13

Friday, June 26, 2009

Clinging

Psalm 63:8 - My whole being follows hard after You and clings closely to You; Your right hand upholds me.

It's funny how God grows us. I wrote a lot of what I'm about to share about a year ago. Recently God has expanded my picture of what clinging is and looks like.

I was having one of those sweet mornings. I had a few moments to read my Bible. My sleepy-eyed three-and-a-half year old little boy slowly walks to the living room and simply says, “Mommy, I want to hold you.” How can you resist that?! So, we snuggled on the couch, chatted for a bit, got breakfast and watched a little bit of TV. Then we got ready for school/daycare because mommy had to get to work. The meltdown began and continued intermittently until we got to the school parking lot. The message he kept giving me in his pathetic, little whiny voice was, “Mommy, I just want to hold you.”

It was just a rough morning, for both of us by this time. I told his teacher he was a bit clingy this morning. She started tickling him while I made my escape, which made me so sad.

Then as only our sweet Heavenly Father could do, He reminded me of what being clingy really means. So, I looked up the word “cling” in the dictionary. Here’s what it said:

1 a: to hold together b: to adhere as if glued firmly c: to hold or hold on tightly or tenaciously 2 a: to have a strong emotional attachment or dependence b: to remain or linger as if resisting complete dissipation or dispersal

Wow! I thought how much I long for my children to cling to me, but how I want them to grow into strong, God-fearing, God-loving independent men. In our human-ness we can’t do or be both. However, God simply reminded me that clinging to Him is a great picture of what he wants our relationship to look like. He wants me to eat solid food, get more nutrients, take responsibility for my actions and attitude, but at the end of the day if I don’t cling to him, I have no strength – nothing to give.

So what does clinging to him look like? For me, it looks like this…
When I’m struggling with that sin that I keep choosing to do, I must cling to him to overcome its hold on me.
1. When I’m scared and uncertain about the future, I must cling to him because he holds the future. I must talk with him and listen to him so I know what my next steps will be.
2. When I’m overwhelmed with doing to much, I must cling to him and ask him what needs to go in my schedule and then refer to #1 so I can be obedient.

3. When I don’t know where to turn, turn to the one who knows the best directions and the best plans for you.
4. Take a look at all of Psalm 63 – It’s a good picture of clinging! All in all, it looks like a sweet child resting in her Father’s arms. Enjoying the time together. Savoring His presence.
5. Take a look at John 17:10-18. In verse 17 Jesus tells Mary Magdalene to stop clinging to him because he has not yet returned to the Father.

I noticed that sometimes I cling to so many other things than the One who oversees the universe. Other times I cling to parts of Jesus, but not the complete Jesus. This is what I mean - Mary Magdalene was clinging to a relationship with Jesus even though it wasn't complete. He still had to go be with the Father so the Holy Spirit could come for and be with us. Who or what are you clinging to? Are you clinging to a relationship the way you remember it or are you embracing the way the relationship really exists (or doesn't exist) now? It's hard to cling to the new normal or the new comfort zone. The more we know who Jesus is, the more we have to cling to.

Join me in the journey of living a life clinging to Jesus.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Despereaux

OK, it's been too long! Getting into the swing and trying to find my groove with my new normal - a husband, 2 boys and work. Did everything get more demanding while I wasn't looking? It's all good though!

I must say that right now my walk with God mirrors my kids. Ian is learning who is the boss and how to be a good listener and follow through with obedience. Ryan is starting to teeth, so full of pain and wanting to cry and scream. But then a moment later he is so full of pure joy and he gives you a big coo and the biggest smile ever. I'm amazed at the parallels our sweet Daddy gives us in life!

Speaking of parallels, last week's Bible study was on Hannah (quite appropriate for Mother's Day). While teaching, Scott asked, "What is your heart sorrowful about?" Then he talked about handing it over to God, just like Hannah did. I was struck with the hurt of my heart with missing my boys and just where life has us right now. It is good, it just hurts. There is such freedom when we hand our hurts over to our Daddy King. He's the only one that turns mourning to gladness and makes things new each morning.

Then my sweet sister, Traci, bought Ian a new movie and it has quicly become one of my favorites ever! The Tale of Despereaux tells the story about a brave mouse. http://www.thetaleofdespereauxmovie.com/splash/ He has been made for nobleness and is honorable, but everyone around him lives in fear. He's the one who breaks out and rescues the princess. It's awesome! So here's to freedom, boldness and fun in Jesus!

Be blessed!
Love & Prayers,
Kim